I got to Monkey's school by 11:50 to pick him up. I got my usual "Mo-meee!!" when I entered the classroom, but Monkey was just staring at his play-doh, so not like him. So we stayed, as we do every school day to see all of his friends off. It wasn't until he stood up, I understood why the play-doh had not been terrorized, Monkey had peed in his pants. AGHHHH!!! And does he have a change of clothes in his cubby??? I am the super-organized mom, right?? Yeah, well I guess not so much... there were no clothes in his cubby. I haven't sent a new change in since his last accident, I don't even know when. So now I had to drive home with a kid who's got pee running down his leg. Oh joy. (Just a side note: the school offered us their loners but I most politely declined.)
Anyhow, I drive home get all of our stuff out of the car, get to the front door and realize "I don't have a house key." Its sitting on the shelf right inside the front door. I took it off earlier this week because we had a rearranging of cars and childcare. I had meant to ask Mr. Dunbar to replace it on my key ring, but in my craziness last night it slipped my mind. So now I have a handful of junk, one kid with pee running down his leg, and another who needs to take a nap. Another AGHH!
I get back in the car and call Mr. Dunbar's office. Voicemail. mini-aghh! Call his cell phone. Voicemail. Slightly larger agh! Call office again. Voicemail. But as it clicks on my phone beeps, he's calling me from his cell. Click over tell him the situation, he says okay, I'll be waiting with the key. When I get all the way to his office he asks, "How come you just didn't get Larry's key?" Ummm... because I didn't think about walking the 10 yards to the neighbors house, I'd rather drive 20 minutes and waste gas!!! Now, I am back to another AGHHHH!!
So I get home, get a sleeping Monkey onto his bed, change him out of his wet clothes, and walk out. Bogie, however, never fell asleep and is in no way whatsoever going to let me put him down. He wants to play. I am exhausted, I need to sit. Bogie crawls into what I think is his room. Next thing you know I hear disaster. You know; things falling, kid grunting, and again things falling. I go into his room. He is not there. I look down the hallway into the bathroom and see this:
Like I said disaster. In all of about 18 seconds.
Monkey, my kid who can sleep through anything is now awake. He slept for a total of 10 minutes but now he wants to get off of his bed. I say "okay."
Well, since everyone is awake and nobody wants to take a nap, I think to myself "Well, we might as well go run errands. "
First stop, Staples, the printer is out of toner.
When we get there I ask the first sales associate I can find what I am looking for, he needs to go look it up because my printer is not one of the most popular ones that has toner on the first aisle. As he heads off I look down to find Monkey doing the "I am going to hold it" pose. (Knees together, butt out.) I look at him. He looks at me. I look at him again. He looks at me and says, "I'm going to hold the poo poo Mommy. I'll wait till we get home." Oh, no your not! I'm not letting you in my car with poop! So we trek off to go find the bathroom. Has anyone with an infant and a toddler ever gone to a public bathroom? This is more than an adventure, it is an excursion! I"m holding the handbag, infant, toddler and don't anybody touch a thing! This was not an easy task. I won't go into detail, just imagine me squatting, holding Bogie in one arm, holding Monkey up with the other...
We get out of the bathroom and the sales associate tells me he's found my toner. Great, whats my total? $185. What!?!? Yes, that's right, close to $200 big ones for TONER. Do you know what I could buy for $200 bucks? No wonder, my toner wasn't in the first aisle, nobody can afford it! I can buy a whole new printer for that amount. But of course, I just smile, while my brain is about to go in a fizz mode, and hand over the American Express. Then I tell the cashier, my husband has a business account here... she looks it up and says, he just called and put one on hold are you sure that you only need one? Uh, yeah. Any more that this and I won't be able to buy groceries this week. Again, two hundred dollars for TONER.
Next stop, post office. I drive up to the post office but are there any close up parking spaces? No. Lucky for me, while I was whining about not finding a close parking space, I was also on the phone with Mr. Dunbar (retelling my Staples story) and he told me about the secret post office boxes in the back, where the parking spaces drive up to them. Hooray for that. Chalk one up for Mr. Dunbar! Post office task, complete.
Third stop, we headed off to the local community college to get transcripts that I have to order.
Of course, EVERYTHING has changed since I took a few classes there a DECADE ago... where am I supposed to park??? Well in the first open space of course. Remembering, this is a college campus, you need a parking permit everywhere... I took my chances. Unloaded both kids, grabbed my handbag and figured it can't be that far to walk. WRONG. Bogie and his 20 pound self was swapped from arm to arm all the way to the Admin Center in the middle of campus. I filled out the form for the transcripts and headed towards the window, in the middle of which was a bright green sign that said, "All transcripts must be paid for at the Business Office." What?!?!? More hiking?? Don't these people know I'm carrying a 20 pound chunk and I have a whining 3 year old in tow? Okay, folks, we can do this. I felt like the little train that could, only my arm was about to fall off but I was not about to give up, we came here to accomplish something, and by golly we will. So we hiked all the way to the other end of campus, got to the Business Office, get to the front of the line, put my form in the window, and the 18 year-old student says to me, "Did you turn in this form at the Admin Office?" "UH, No, the sign said I had to pay for it here." He then proceeds to tell me, yes, you do pay for it here AFTER you submit it there. You. have. got. to be. JOKING! At this point the little train that could was about to blow some steam. Remember the AGH!! Yeah, well, it was back. AGHHH!!!
We trek back to Admin, turn in our form, hike back to the Business Office pay for the transcripts and barely stagger back to our car. I swear I thought my arms were going to fall off, I could feel blisters forming on my feet, and trying to convince Monkey we were "almost to our car" was a bit dubious, but we made it. Barely. Did I mention I was wearing 4 inch high shoes. No joke.
11 comments:
Okay, I am seriously on the floor now, I am laughing so hard. Sorry to laugh at your expense, but that was hysterical. What a day! That's what you get for trying to be ambitious... things never work out when you have kids in tow. That's the story of my life! But it sure does provide some good blogging material, doesn't it??
Crazy day! After the toner I would of been done. Horray for you! You are a Super Mom in my book.
What a day! Good thing you started out the way you did or you might have gone crazy at the forgotten key!
My favorite part of the story?
"When I get all the way to his office he asks, "How come you just didn't get Larry's key?"
That is so me and my husband!
That's one of those "quicksand days" -- where everything you do feels like you're moving in quicksand.
What a day! I'm tired after reading about yesterday's adventures and in 4" heels - my hero!
I can relate to the public restroom with young one. Nightmare! It's usually always in the front of the store and you're in the very back and then they have to go asap. Then they tell you not to bring in the cart. I bring it in...throw the 2 kids who are not using the facilities into it so they can't touch everything. There really is no easy way around this.
Hope today's more relaxing.
Oh my goodness, you poor thing! I'm wondering where your stroller was. Thanks for your comment on my blog...that's funny that your mom has the same couch. Somebody else left a comment who has it too.
I just love reading your blogs! Being a Mom is a universal language, we all can relate to and feel comfort we are not alone :) You turn your stressful day into something for us to laugh hopefully with you and not at.
Thanks for leading me to these blogs...I am hooked and am almost tempted to start my own ;)
Oh my gosh...what a day!!!
Now that I am inching closer and closer to our due date, I'm in a kind of panic wondering how in the world I am going to make it with TWO kids.... ;o)
The way you recalled your day was just hilarious! I was saying "ARGH!" along with you. :) Hope your weekend is very restful.
All I can say is... welcome! H
Wow!!! that is all I have for you!! But you looked cute in your shoes :)
Post a Comment